Odds are you’re busier now than you were two years ago. There’s no end to the demands on our time, and being a follower of Jesus seems to only increase that demand with the dozens of good works, church activities, and high priority of family. If you, like many of the people I’m close with, fully believe that we’re called by Jesus to orient our lives towards disciple making and missional living, it can feel incredibly overwhelming.
Somehow in the midst of that overwhelming schedule we’re supposed to have something called “balance”, miraculously finding a way to equalize the pressure of ministry, family, work, church, health, rest, and much more. The reality is that balance seems nearly impossible, and striving to achieve it just feels like more work.
What if balance shouldn’t be our goal? What if balance is a lie that leaves us all falling short and freaking out as we discover we’re never going to manage to reach it?
Jesus’ Unbalanced Life
If you were to evaluate Jesus’ life based on the advice of “balanced lives” type books such as Cloud’s Boundaries, Jesus was way out of whack. His life was totally unbalanced. He didn’t have a 9-5 job, or even a way to clock out. He certainly doesn’t seem to get enough sleep, with the Gospels regularly recording him getting up “very early” to pray and staying up until the middle of the night to do things like walk on water. There were times where he was so busy that he wasn’t able to eat a meal. And he certainly didn’t seem to avoid overly needy people. On top of that Jesus had twelve guys who he apparently spent almost all of his time with, and as his ministry grew he was constantly being followed by crowds of people clamoring for his attention.
Jesus’ life was certainly not balanced. At least not in the way that we tend to talk about balance. Yet in the midst of that chaos and seemingly endless work, Jesus had peace, joy, energy, and rest, all of the things that we often look to balance to provide. What did Jesus know have that we don’t?
Identity, not Balance
I believe that Jesus was able to sustain through the chaos of the years of his ministry because he knew his identity. He wasn’t worried about balance because he was built solidly on his identity as the Son of the Father.
At the outset of his ministry Jesus is baptized and the Father declares over him, “This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased.” This identity as a beloved Son grounded Jesus and was the wellspring of the joy, peace, energy, and all the rest that he needed.
The problem with balance is that it implies that we have multiple core identities that must each have their appropriate weight for us to function properly. You’re a mother, daughter, employee, and disciple-maker and need to juggle all three. You’re a husband, ministry leader, musician, and writer and need to be able to switch effectively between those roles based on the current context.
That kind of identity-shifting is exhausting. We weren’t created to operate from multiple identities – we were created to be grounded in the image of God and for everything that we are to flow from that foundational space in our soul. It’s like slacklining or tight-rope walking. If you step out on the rope and begin wobbling, the default instinct is to look down at your feet and focus on stopping the wobbling so you find balance. The counter-intuitive reality is that the more you focus on the rope and the way you’re wobbling, struggling to balance, the more likely you are to lose your balance completely. What’s needed is to put your focus on a solid, immobile object in front of you and focus fully on that. Let the steadiness of it teach you what balance looks like.
Uncover Your Core Identity
We need to take our eyes off the impossible objective of balance and fix them firmly on the solid reality of our identity in Christ. When we know who we’ve been created to be we’ll inevitably discover that we’re empowered to flow with a common purpose from one role to the next within our lives.
If you’re a follower of Jesus you don’t need to craft some sort of identity. It’s already been given to you, just like it was given to Jesus at his baptism. You’re a beloved son or daughter of God. He’s pleased with you. Accept it. Let his love uncover who you are. As you do you will find yourself in a place of peace that no balanced life could ever give.
Kelly and I are preparing for the birth of our second son next month. It’s overwhelming to imagine having another tiny human to manage along with leading two ministries, fundraising, being a husband, working to embody and communicate the Gospel to our neighbors, and much more. Honestly, I can’t balance it all. I need to be firmly rooted in my identity in Christ if I’m going to have the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, and all the rest of the beautiful fruits of the Spirit that are ours as followers of Jesus. So do you.
Let’s give up on balance and get focused on Jesus.
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