We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians, and opened wide our hearts to you. We are not withholding our affection from you, but you are withholding yours from us. As a fair exchange—I speak as to my children—open wide your hearts also.
2 Corinthians 6:11-13
Would the people around you describe you as open-hearted? For myself, I’m not sure if they would. Oh, I’m friendly and welcoming and generally enjoyable to be around, but open-hearted? Not sure.
Far too many of us operate with closed, hidden hearts. Whether from fear of being hurt or the simple stoic conditioning that seems to be an integral part of midwestern Christianity, we’ve been taught to believe that being level-headed is more important than loving with our whole heart.
In his second letter to the Corinthian church Paul describes his attitude toward the believers as “open-hearted, declaring that he has in no way withheld his affections from them, despite the fact that they have withheld theirs from him, apparently going so far as to turn their back on him and begin to question his apostleship.
A quick question for you on this Monday before Christmas. Will you commit to going to your family gatherings with an open heart?
What Open-Heartedness looks like
Skim through 2 Corinthians and you’ll get a picture of what open-heartedness looks like. An open-hearted person:
Speaks honestly and freely
As Paul states in the verse quoted above, he speaks (writes) freely to the Corinthian Christians. Honesty and truthfulness are a key part of open-hearted living. Speaking freely here doesn’t mean just saying whatever you think. Instead it’s an honesty about who you truly are, what you’re feeling, and where you’re struggling. This is particularly true when it comes to ones’ weaknesses.
Acknowledges their weakness
Paul describes himself as a broken clay jar, and states that he feels as if he’s been sentenced to death (1:1-11). He describes his own struggles, beatings, and pain.
An open-hearted person doesn’t feel the need to hide their weakness. Quite the opposite. They know the truth that it is through their weakness that people are drawn to Christ and God is glorified, so they don’t feel a need to hide their addiction, their financial struggles, their depression, or whatever the weakness might be.
Desires to know the other’s heart
Paul’s longing appears to be that the Corinthians would open their hearts to him. He wants to know them and be known by them and for them to know Christ.
An open-hearted person has been freed to securely know and empathize with the feelings and thoughts of those around them. Rather than being self-focused they are able to know those around them in meaningful, transformative ways because they’ve been grounded in Jesus.
Knows their identity is in Christ
This is the most foundational piece for living with an open heart. To the extent that we know that our identity is grounded in Christ we will be free to speak openly and freely, acknowledge our weakness, and know others.
You, open-hearted
Being open-hearted is no easy thing. It’s a risk to entrust others with your actual fears, hopes, frustrations, and failures. Far easier to stay closed off, defensive, and reserved. Particularly when that’s what’s expected of a good Christian.
But that kind of closed-heartedness isn’t what’s demonstrated by Paul. Paul has clearly been hurt and spurned by some in the Corinthian church, yet he writes to them with trust that God is at work. He takes the risk of baring himself to them.
Can we do the same with those around us this Christmas?
As you go to gather with family and friends this week, practice being open hearted. Speak openly, honestly, and graciously (even if it’s hard), acknowledge your needs and struggles, and ask questions that will give you opportunities to know the hearts of those around you. Do this all from the rich wellspring of love that is yours in Christ.
May God use us to open others’ hearts as well as we do so.
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